The Teen Sensation That Is Rebecca Black and Ark Records

Justin Bieber watch out, your crown for worst song of the decade is in grave danger of being taken away. Your competitor: Miss Rebecca Black and her YouTube hit “Friday”. With over 66 million views and counting, JB may not be quaking in his bootees just yet, what with his single “Baby” gathering over half a billion views but considering his video has been up over a year and hers just one month, the time for him to start throwing his toys out of his pram looks to be just around the corner. So where the hell did this 13-year old ‘singer’ come from then?

Well contrary to the rumour that she is actually an auto-tuned robot, sent to destroy the music industry one single at a time, Miss Black is actually a real person from the state of California. Her song ‘Friday’ is also real, contrary to the belief that it was at first a massive piss-take. Unfortunately it is not. However, the blame should not be put entirely on the shoulders of the songs front tween, but instead on the shoulders of the music label Ark Music Factory, the label that wrote the ‘lyrics’ for the track, ‘lyrics’ that include the ever-compelling repetition of ‘Fun fun fun” and the genius that is “Gota get down on Friday”.

Rebecca Black is 13, where the hell is she ‘getting down’? I dread to think and so should her parents. The blacks aren’t the only people that should be worried however, as Ark Music’s roster is full of girls just like the above, ready to dominate our airwaves and bang the final nail in the ‘pop’ coffin.

Simon Cowell may be on board, but even he has blasted the appalling song writing and Chris Brown has jumped to the tween ship, but then who really cares what he thinks. These are the only two people I can think of who haven’t completely slated ‘Friday’ and yet for all the bad press and negative reaction she has got, Rebecca Black has still managed to become a teen sensation over-night. Having an awful song has not only got her a foot in the door, but her whole body in the limelight.

Its backward, its absurd and unfortunately its seems to be the way things are heading, especially if Ark Music Factory gets it way. So before they do anymore damage I say we burn it down or maybe just get a petition to close it doors forever. The choice is yours, but don’t use me as an excuse when you go to court for arson. The judge won’t believe it and I will have deleted this post before you can prove it.